Get a government job (1)     Among the many citizens who have heeded my call to GET A GOVERNMENT JOB! is . . . Mrs. Derbyshire. Laid off several months ago from her job in retail sales, she is now deep in Civil Service test-prep study guides, currently this one. Sample question:

Suppose that a person you are interviewing becomes angry at some of the questions you have asked, calls you meddlesome and nosy, and states that she will not answer those questions. 
 
Of the following, which is the BEST action for you to take?

A.  Explain the reasons the questions are asked and the importance of the answers.

B.  Inform the interviewee that you are only doing your job and advise her that she should answer your questions or leave the office.

C.  Report to your supervisor what the interviewee called you and refuse to continue the interview.

D.  End the interview and tell the interviewee she will not be serviced by your department.

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If it were me doing the interviewing, the sentence “Don’t let the door hit you on the way out” would occur at some point in the situation. Plainly I’m not cut out for Civil Service work: The correct answer is A.

I have advised Mrs. D. that while it would be nice if she were to land a government job, there is a strategy that she, a person of minoritude, can employ for much higher return on investment. She should form a cabal with all the other minority test-takers to deliberately score low on the test, then sue for disparate impact. That way she’ll not only get a job from which no one would ever dare to fire her, she would get a big fat cash settlement too.

When I suggested this, the lady sighed and rolled her eyes. She does that a lot.


Get a government job (2)     Consider the following proposition, gentle reader. For nine years — day in, day out, week in, week out, month in, month out, for nine blessed years you will be paid an excellent salary — currently $100,049 per annum. The salary comes with full health benefits and a handsome pension — $82,000 if you were to retire today, which you are not about to do, as the pension increases by $1,700 every year you stay on the job, You also accumulate sick days, and get paid in cash for half of them when you eventually retire.

Sweet deal, huh? What kind of work are you doing for all that extravagance? Nothing. Zip, zilch, nada, rien, nichts, nichevo, nothing. Fact, you can run a private law business and manage $8 million worth of inherited property while on the “job.” And all that boodle we’re paying you is from the public fisc, which can never go broke! Is this a great country, or what?